I think this is a little in bad taste but can't say I have not felt frustrated before. Bit harsh to blame the drivers though?
http://www.backingblair.co.uk/london_underground/
London Underground: The Song (from the album Fitness to Practice)

To the guy ranting and raving as he tried to get off the tube tonight needs to chill but for those people blocking the doors, it wouldnt kill you to get off the tube and then back on. I am sure noone will steal the spot you had standing amongst the crowds.

It was New year's Eve and had just about enough of leery guys but I was in a good mood after a great night out and also quite drunk. I was on my way home on the jubilee line (narrowly avoiding a puddle of sick) when a Pete Doherty lookalike started talking to me.

From Times Online

The voiceover artist who lost her job telling millions of Underground users to "mind
the gap" after publishing a host of spoof announcements on her website
is to take a job telling drivers what to do on SatNav instead.

I wonder if in the next round of Tube train making they could include cup holders on the tube - I know it's a long shot and noone wants to smell my coffee but gee that would be swell...