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I think this is a little in bad taste but can't say I have not felt frustrated before. Bit harsh to blame the drivers though?
http://www.backingblair.co.uk/london_underground/
London Underground: The Song (from the album Fitness to Practice)

To the guy ranting and raving as he tried to get off the tube tonight needs to chill but for those people blocking the doors, it wouldnt kill you to get off the tube and then back on. I am sure noone will steal the spot you had standing amongst the crowds.

It was New year's Eve and had just about enough of leery guys but I was in a good mood after a great night out and also quite drunk. I was on my way home on the jubilee line (narrowly avoiding a puddle of sick) when a Pete Doherty lookalike started talking to me.

From Times Online

The voiceover artist who lost her job telling millions of Underground users to "mind
the gap" after publishing a host of spoof announcements on her website
is to take a job telling drivers what to do on SatNav instead.

I wonder if in the next round of Tube train making they could include cup holders on the tube - I know it's a long shot and noone wants to smell my coffee but gee that would be swell...

I think we all know there is a distinct lack of elevators on the london tube network. So when you see someone struggling with bags up and down stairs...yes even the Tourists who don't know better, why not give them a hand and make their day. And even if you need to put down your London Lite, London Paper or Metro. There are enough gentlemen left to achieve that surely!

But TFL - please make more elevators in the stations please. The rest of the world is making us look bad. 

but sadly did nothing about it and niether did he...how can I find him? We got on at Victoria. He sat opposite me in a black coat, dark hair, brown bag, quite tall and possible slight Australian accent. With a friend, with suitcases, returning from somewhere. He got off at Oxford Circus, and said 'see you tomorrow' to his friend - so maybe he works near there. I live in Manchester so its unlikely our paths will ever cross again...If you are reading - hey its me with the blue velvet coat who you smiled at in a shy seductive way -where are you?

I would love to hear if anyone has actually had a sliding doors experience on the London Tube. That is met someone and actually gone out for a drink...dinner...or anything...wow I wonder if anyone actually got married after meeting on the underground....

To the guy eating Burger King 15cm from my face on the Piccadilly line Tube on Friday, Hearthrow bound, dude - it wasn't cool, it smelt bad and you didn't need to stand in my face. Plan your day better and eat before getting on. There - that feels better already...